How do you make important decisions? I will bet it’s not by leaving critical decisions to chance. And isn’t it true that the more important a decision is, the more effort you put into gathering information, discussing the issues with stakeholders, and creating solutions that work? How to divorce is one of the most important decisions most people will ever make. Too often people blindly leap to litigation without ever making a conscious decision about divorce process. Will you choose litigation and the adversarial legal process or will you choose mediation?
After the decision to divorce is made, divorcing spouses often skip the question of how to divorce and go straight to “lawyering up.” Maybe most people don’t know there is more than one way to divorce, but there is more than one way to divorce. The process you choose is central to the quality of the divorce terms you end up living with for the rest of your life. A lawyer mediator is skilled at guiding you through divorce decision-making.
Mediation keeps you out of court. Given a choice, would you rather maintain your role as decision-maker for yourself and your family, or would you prefer to turn decision-making over to a court commissioner or judge? You have a choice.
Mediation is private. Given a choice, would you rather keep your finances and personal circumstances private or would you prefer to air them in a public court? You have a choice.
Mediation supports family communication and keeps the needs of your children front and center. You and your spouse are probably having trouble communicating or you wouldn’t be getting a divorce. If you have minor children, you and your spouse need to figure out how to communicate as co-parents for the rest of your lives. Failing to communicate as co-parents puts your children at risk and sets your family up for years of protracted litigation. Your family doesn’t have to make this important transition alone. A skilled divorce mediator will give you practical guidance through the legal process as well as support to explore what is best for you and your family. Courts and judges are simply not set up to provide support and guidance through family transitions.
Alternative dispute resolution alternatives like mediation and collaborative divorce teach us that divorce doesn’t have to be adversarial. You don’t have to form opposing teams and go to battle. You don’t need a judge to keep score and declare a winner and a loser. Instead you can work with a divorce mediator who will guide you as you craft your own divorce agreement – you don’t have to leave important decisions to chance.
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