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DDefine divorce as a future focused planning process.
Traditional divorce defines spouses as adversaries, courtrooms as battlefields, and lawyers as gladiators. All of those definitions compound the pain of divorce. Reject the traditional definition of divorce and use a better divorce process. You are restructuring your family, not ending it.
AAccept that your marriage is over.
Only after you reach acceptance are you able to do the hard work of planning a better future. Acceptance is at the heart of recovery from grief and the ability to imagine a life without pain. Get the help of a therapist, if necessary, to deal with your entirely normal feelings of anger, betrayal, and blame.
RReview your financial and life circumstances with a clear head.
Get expert help from a lawyer and a financial expert. Do not face the complex legal proceeding that is divorce without expert assistance.
EEngage in a meaningful negotiation process to reach decisions that are right for you and your family.
Do not turn your decision-making authority over to a Judge or Court Commissioner. They are strangers to you and your family. They will never understand your priorities and fears as well as you do.
- Invest your family’s financial resources in expert help – don’t try
to do this alone.
- Hire experts who share your goals: finding solutions not fighting.
- You choose how your divorce is handled. Choose wisely.
The Collaborative Difference